Steps in Finding Freedom From My Unhappy Story About You

1. Return to the Present – There are no problems in this moment. It’s only the regrets of the past and the angst about the future that is capable of generating misery. The ego abducts us into the land of time; the realm of unconsciousness, by occupying us with thoughts of the past and future. Neither of these places exists – except in the mind. Core beliefs live in the mind as well – they are deceivers that cannot survive in the NOW.

2. Use Your Negative Reactions as Messengers – Focus your attention on the places you get hooked in your current life situation and use the negative emotions that arise, to connect you to the unresolved wounds from childhood. Remember, whenever you have a negative reaction, it is always about the unresolved emotional charge that you are carrying from your past. See the triggering person or situation as a messenger who is reflecting an old pattern or core belief within you. Your negative reaction tells you that there is personal unresolved emotion that you are being given the chance to make conscious for release. This is the ultimate route to freedom.

3. Conscious Observation – The famous Sufi, Rumi, said, “Don’t go back to sleep!” Staying conscious is the first and most important tool for liberation from our core belief stories. It is not how long we stay conscious, but how often we ‘come to’ about our stories that matters. Every time we wake up in the middle of an old pattern, without judging ourselves for being there, we have won another round. That’s all that we need to do… see it! As Jung said, “Anything we can make conscious, we can transform.” It is the key to freedom. It is not our job to awaken our loved ones, however. That is their task.

4. Shifting My Perception – Changing the way you see something can make all the difference. It won’t change the event, but it can affect how you view the event and what it means to you, which changes everything. For example, rather than considering yourself “unimportant” because your parents didn’t have a lot of time to spend with you, you can simply shift the way you are seeing the situation. This completely alters the way you feel about both the situation and you.

5. Physical Alignment/Daily Practice – Letting go of resistance to what is, as Eckhart Tollé suggests, is the key to peace. Your core belief story can only exist as long as you believe it or resist it with negative reactions! when you fight for or against it, it fights back. When you stop persisting or resisting it, the story has no choice but to fall away. Then the authentic self is revealed. Acceptance comes with surrender. Letting go of resistance includes accepting others in this moment, just as they are. Do it and watch how full of love and abundance life becomes.

6. Practice Gratitude – Appreciation follows on the heels of acceptance. When we accept what is, we automatically raise our level of gratitude. We learn to see what a powerful antidote to fear, and all forms of negativity gratitude is. Our limiting core story is abolished when heartfelt appreciation is felt and expressed. In A Course in Miracles, it is said that love and fear cannot abide in the same space. Core Beliefs are anchored in fear whereas gratitude is born of love and serves as the great antidote to all negativities. Because whatever we focus on expands, insisting on a grateful state of mind, allows us to bring more abundance and goodness into our personal relationships.

7. Forgiveness – By definition, forgiveness means to “let go” (for-go) of our unhappy story about the other. We do this more for ourselves, than for those who have been hurtful to us. Ask yourself who you are helping (or hurting) by refusing to forgive. It also helps to remember that what we judge in others as unforgivable is, inevitably, mirroring something inside of us that is asking to be forgiven. Self-forgiveness is the ultimate goal.